Push or Wuss?

Since I don't follow a training plan, and tend to just go with what feels right, I sometimes wonder if I am pushing enough. Or if I let myself wuss out too much. With no one to tell me what to do, or simply if life gets in the way, I can modify my running plan for the week, or even the day, on the fly. I don't know if this is a good thing or a bad thing. Perhaps it simply just is. Sometimes, I think I give myself an "out" too easily, but today, as I was rush rush rush rush rushing out the door to get in my miles, amidst the thoughts of "Must go faster! Must get in these 7 miles. OK, you have 1:10 to run, shower and get in the car, go go go!" part of my brain was like, "Whoa, lady. Just slow down. Take a deep breath. Maybe we should rethink things and just mellow out today. If we change things around a bit, you can still get in the miles, just in a different way." Just the thought of not stressing over the miles this morning gave me a sense of peace. And so, I listened. I slowed down and decided to simply run 3 miles at a leisurely pace instead of trying to cram 7 miles into a time frame that clearly wasn't very workable.

I came home feeling much less stressed out, with time to not only take a shower, but clean the shower and the bathroom, which desperately needed it, and still get to work on time. Even Ryan, who came rushing down the stairs thinking something was wrong when I walked in 27 minutes later, instead of 1:10 later, told me he thought I had actually made the right decision, and if anyone is one to push, it is him. Of course, he's had to live with me and my slightly stressed-out high-mileage (amongst other things) self for the past week and a half :-) In any event, I said I would get in 50 miles this week, and oh, I will, but sometimes something has to give. And today, well, 4 miles had to give :-) Hopefully, though, my mellow run today will mean that I have a solid up-tempo 11 mile road run tomorrow, and then I can run the remaining 4 miles as a recovery run on Saturday, and it will all be good. I mean, I don't run to be stressed about running. I run to feel good, and to feel good about my running. Yes, I realize that sometimes you have to push and do what might not be easiest, but in the end, isn't this all supposed to be for fun?