July 29 - Headed back to NC

July 29, 2005
Danielle:
I just can't seem to let go. I keep crying. I want to be out there still. I don't want it to be over. As we drive down the highway with my parents, headed to NC to pick up the car, it seems surreal and yet, it makes it all seem so final. We are done. It sucks. It is sad. I had said to Ryan that this thruhike does not define us, that making it or not does not define us, but d@#* it, I really wanted us to make it. I feel out of focus. My mind has been stuck on Katahdin for so long, and now that is no longer an option for this year. It will sit in my mind of course, and I don't really think I'll rest until we've pieced together the rest of our 660 miles, but for now we just must move on. I've given myself today to be sad, and then, it's time to think about other things, and get Ryan all healed up and better again, so that we can get back out there on the trail and in the woods again another time.

But in the meantime, I can't resist sharing the following...
What I will NOT miss about the trail:
PA
NY
the overgrown trail
the poison ivy
being smelly, sticky and dirty most days
putting on wet clothes
being wet and damp for days on end, either from rain or humidity
the bugs, ants and spiders
hitchhiking

What I WILL miss about the trail:
counting salamanders
the simplicity of the trail--everything you need is on your back; every day you wake up and put one foot in front of another and follow the white blazes north
enjoying the cool breeze atop a rocky ridge
picking blueberries along the trail
Hairball's campfires
watching the hawks and vultures ride the airwaves
sticking my legs in a cold, clean stream
noticing the Scarlet Tanagers and other birds in the woods
tromping along the trail with my best friend
the comraderie that develops out on the trail
reading the shelter registers and catching up on the trail "news"
all the wonderful trail magic we received
and most of all, the friends we made--Patch, Clearwater, Hairball & Snowbunny, Hopeful & Redwing, Bravo, Fatigue, Free, Train & Raindrop, Beantown, L.B., Coyote, Free Radical and everyone else who made the trip special to us.